Well, it's official. My firstborn is in elementary school. He has started a long, wonderful journey that (I hope) will culminate in him becoming an adult and setting out on his own and he doesn't even know it.
When he went for the first time, he was so excited that he practically bounded into school. The halls were full of children, exclaiming over books in the library and art on the walls, and he seemed to just absorb the enthusiasm. I didn't get sad or weepy--probably because my main concern for the preceding 24 hours had been that baby girl would fuss through the drop-off process and distract us all from the major moment happening in her brother's life. That didn't happen (she stayed asleep in the carrier on my chest), and I was so relieved by the freedom to enjoy Big Brother that it never occurred to me to be anything but happy. Maybe the emotions will catch up when I no longer have a newborn.
And so it's happened. There's a really big boy in our house. A full blown child. And I'm so proud of him.
Things on other fronts have not been quite so smooth--perhaps that is obvious from my silence in this space. I am slowly learning that life only feels like it's really out of control when one is desperately trying to grab hold of control. I hope that at some point I'll be able to report that I'm trusting the only One who can truly handle it. For now, we're trying to take deep breaths, cherish sleep and time together when we get it, and enjoy the benefits of the slow, still time at home that is required by a family with a precious new baby.
I hope you're well!
I don't think your little boy could possibly get any cuter (but I'm sure your pictures in your not-yet-penned posts will prove me wrong).
ReplyDeleteTake care, Elisabeth - you have a lot of friends in the blogging community that are cheering you on with your new-mom-again adventure. :D
"I am slowly learning that life only feels like it's really out of control when one is desperately trying to grab hold of control."
ReplyDeleteHMMMMM.
Powerful and real, dear friend, and echoes much of what I was thinking today. So much time and energy spent worrying or fretting, desperately grasping for reigns when all our Loving Father really wants us to do is have us climb into his lap and let him lead the way. Here's to the affirmation of faith that He is our all and all, and everything else will fall into place.
Hope to see you soon, dear friend, and much, much love...to REAL big brother, little brother, and baby sister...and Big Jimbo, too!
CT